Dear Employee

I found an old letter printed on RGIS letterhead the other day. It was sent out to all the auditors in my district from Jeff, our former AM who shortly before the letter was written had been promoted to be our District Manager. For your amusement I am reprinting it here verbatim.



September 28, 2001



"Dear Employee,



It was not long ago that the Santa Rosa District was considered one of the top in our division. Due to circumstances in the past, we have allowed ourselves to fall below the company standard, a standard that this district helped to set. We are now going to correct the mistakes of the past and will, with your help, reset the standards for RGIS. We realize that this cannot happen overnight, but the changes that we are implementing will allow us to get back on track.



Fifteen months ago, the districts of the Bay Area came together and agreed upon a set of goals that all districts would strive for. Sadly, not one office was able to achieve those goals. As a result, more than half of the managers that attended that first meeting are no longer with RGIS. Our division vice president, Ron ********, and our operations manager, Nate *****, decided it was time for another meeting to reveal what the problem was. Each district had its' own reasons but it was discovered that there were several common issues. It was agreed that all of our districts would work to a single standard without exception. Although many of the standards set forth are directed toward management, there are some that are directed toward field personnel-you. The plan is very simple. THE BAY AREA DISTRICTS OF RGIS WILL BE RETURNING TO BASICS [sic].



What this means to you is such basic things as confirming your schedules on time, being on time in proper uniform, honoring your schedule, using proper tagging, correct inventory paperwork, following established RGIS procedures and policies, etc. Included with this letter are copies of our attendance policy, dress code, and what is expected of auditors. Sign one copy of each and return them to the office by October 5. The other copy is for your records.



We have begun to track each auditor's average per hour (APH). The goal is to identify those who are doing an outstanding job as well as those who are struggling and need additional help or training to come up to standard. The expected APH will be announced at the beginning of each inventory. We realize that not everybody can achieve the expected APH in every inventory. For instance, those who are assigned to more time consuming areas will, no doubt, fall below the expected APH. Overall, the APH for that inventory will be met.



There are more changes to come. If you have an idea you feel would help our district, please share it with a Team Leader or management. Remember that as an auditor in the field, YOU are RGIS [sic].



We thank you for your efforts."



Make what you like of this letter. I for one found it extremely amusing, having worked in the Santa Rosa district for many years. Some of my favorite parts:



The entire first paragraph, for one. Yes, at one point my district was considered to be first-rate, having been awarded several plaques(still hanging proudly on the office walls) from RGIS as the best performing district in the division. Of course, that was before Kenny and Jeff became our managers and really messed things up. They would be the "circumstances of the past" mentioned in that first paragraph, the ones that "allowed ourselves to fall below the company standard." (Of course Jeff, who wrote the letter, didn't consider himself as having been part of the problem. He believed that the entire mess our district was was caused by Kenny only.)



The second paragraph has some really good stuff too. I especially like the part where it states that all of the Bay Area districts "came together and agreed upon a set of goals that all districts would strive for. Sadly, not one office was able to achieve those goals." Darn. "Sadly." Well, just let me shed a tear right now. Sniff. Too droll. Even without knowing exactly what those so-called "goals" were, I'm not surprised that my district wasn't able to meet a single one. I can't imagine former District Manager Kenny or Area Manager/DM Jeff being able to achieve any sort of "goal", unless it was something like "Take A Quality RGIS District And Totally Screw It Up And Run It Straight Into The Ground." In that case? Mission accomplished Kenny and Jeff!



I also liked the statement printed in all caps: "THE BAY AREA DISTRICTS OF RGIS WILL BE RETURNING TO BASICS." This was an obvious (to us auditors) admittance by DM Jeff that he (and Kenny) had really let things go in our district. All the things that were mentioned in the third paragraph, like "confirming schedules on time, being on time in proper uniform, honoring your schedule, using proper tagging, correct inventory paperwork..." etc, were all ignored before this letter was sent out, and they were ignored well after the letter was received by all of us auditors as well. Especially by the F.O.J.'s (Friends Of Jeff). Guys like Gunther and Ethan blithely continued to arrive late (or not at all) to their scheduled inventories, and without any repercussions whatsoever from their pal DM Jeff. So much for "being on time" or "honoring your schedule." Absolutely no one used "proper tagging", with most auditors continuing to tag sporadically or not at all. And few people bothered with "correct inventory paperwork." Most auditors wouldn't trouble themselves to sign their area tags with their name or worksheet number, nor would we bother to fill out our worksheets with the numbers of the areas that we had counted. I mean, we auditors knew that, despite the above letter and some other vague threats from our ridiculous managers, no one would be fired for not following the rules because our district was so permanently hard up for warm bodies to staff our inventories that the managers couldn't afford to let anyone go. So a letter like the one above was a joke. No one took it seriously because we knew we didn't have to. The only way you as an auditor would leave the Santa Rosa district was if you wanted to and thus quit.



I like that next to last paragraph too, where it says "If you have an idea you feel would help our district please share it with a Team Leader or management." Okay, how about a request that DM Jeff stop playing favorites and treat everyone equally? How about DM Jeff not allowing friend Gunther to take two dozen smoke breaks during an inventory, and not allowing best pal Team Leader Ethan to leave an inventory 3 hours before anyone else because he felt "tired." What about the rest of the crew? We're not tired too? Hey, here's an idea. How about when we go into the office to pick up our paychecks, maybe it might be a good idea if your secretary Betty isn't playing solitaire at her desk? Kind of looks bad, don't you think? And when shef etches our checks for us is it possible for her to do so without a snotty attitude? That would be ever so nice. Every time an auditor would go into the office it seemed as though Betty was either playing solitaire or snacking on something. I don't think I ever once saw her actually working on something business-related. Hmm, I wonder if these "ideas" would have gone over well, had I brought them to a TL or management.



And finally, the last paragraph of the letter is a real winner. "Remember that as an auditor in the field, YOU are RGIS." Well, if that's true, then God help RGIS.